Recovery Weeeee!k

For a gal who thrives on structure, this 'unstructured' recovery week was still filled with happy "Weeee!" moments on the road, track, and pool.  I was able to ride new routes with old friends, float as fast as I could next to Coach in the pool, and dust off the TT bike and revisit old routes with new training ohana.  Life is definitely good.

I couldn't have said it better myself, Tony!

Putting in the South Bay miles with Franz

Tail wind.  Tail shot.

Mid-week spin sesh with Stinger.
Does it bother anyone else that this sign wasn't spellchecked?
Or am I that OCD?

Finally some hurdles I'm not afraid of!
What happens at track, stays at track.
Kinda like Vegas.

Superstar couple Wolfie and Hulk TT'in it up

Recovery periods are essential for the body and soul.  And it's funny how in life, the same notion applies. Sometimes you need those mending times to explore freely, without expectations, and allow the healing process to naturally occur.  Because in the end, you will come back stronger, with renewed motivation, and make a few awesome friends along the way.

Tomorrow I'm tackling the Grizzy Peak Century for the 2nd time.  It amazes me how different things are in my life than they were in 2009 when I first attempted it.  Cheers to being able to witness a full recovery in life, love, and sport...

Shadow Art.

Just the title of this post made me smile.  Shadow and art- the nickname I now embrace and love, and the expression of human creative skill and imagination.  I am obsessed with creative people and their processes. 

Shadow photo time while logging trailtime.

I happen to share an office with one of the most creative people I know.  When the white labcoat is shed, she embodies a spirit of curiousity and imagination that takes the form of dance, cooking, gardening, baking, and yoga.  She shared this beautiful video with me.  It was a poignant reminder that our wordless actions can tell a bigger and more beautiful story.  Enjoy.

Ohana.

At first I was going to write a race report, but this really wasn't considered a "race."  In the eyes of the Aussie coach, it was merely a "training session" where he happened to bring a lot more people out to 'play' with.

For me, it was a chance to witness firsthand how our team really is like ohana.

As evidenced on most Sunday rides... ;)

Being single in this sport can be both a blessing and a curse.  I can go to sleep as early as I need to without being guilt-tripped, or wake-up at 4:45am without disrupting someone else's sleep.  But sometimes it helps to have a partner- There were times in the past when I'd come back from work, my bike would be all ready to ride- tires pumped, chain lubed, hydration drinks mixed and in the bottles, and I would just change and we'd roll out to ride before the sunset.  There were race mornings where I'd just hop in the car and sleep, and the directions and navigation were in someone else's reliable hands.  

Saturday I felt very well-taken care of.  Hulk and Wolfie packed my bike up the day before to make things easier logistically.  Race morning, they picked me up at 3:45am.  I slept like a baby.  Not having to drive, fight for parking, and get lost in an area with no reception was a huge load off of my shoulders.

Hulk and Wolfie.
Hulk pushes me in the pool and on the bike, Wolfie pushes me on the track.

Stinger and Transformer went down the day before and picked up everyone and their mother's packets, t-shirts, and water bottles.  It saved a lot of us from having to stand in line race morning and waste precious time that could be spent on important things- like getting our hair braided or standing in the porta-potty line.

Super Sherpa Stinger and Transformer.
This was Transformer's first sprint triathlon and she did amazing!
(Mom, if you're reading, this is the lady I've been talking about!)

Race bib pickup with an added bonus- can you spot the good luck smiley face?

The night before, Warrior gave me my race-day inspiration that turned into my mantra....SHINE.  Today was the day to step out of the shadows and into the light, allowing my inner light to shine.  Her words were a huge encouragement and ran through my mind the entire time.  I literally could not stop smiling the entire time I was on the bike- I felt like Chrissie Wellington, all smiles.  I was just so grateful to be in that moment, doing what I love, and feeling so good doing it.

Race-day mantra.

Race day priorities.  Clearly.

Everything we had done in training already; I have never felt so smooth in my swim and effortless on the bike.  I raced naked- no Garmin, no heartrate monitor, no computer- I felt that data would only be limiting since my goal was just to go fast.  The results that our team had were solid- and that speaks volumes about the incredible coaching and guidance we've received over the past 11 weeks.  Aside from learning cool new words, the Aussie's unique training philosophy and coaching structure have transformed all of us from average athletes to 'thinking' athletes who are more relaxed and race faster.  

And thanks to Coach, Saturday turned out to be a pretty good "training session." 

 "Team Mom" Rising Phoenix and I took 1st and 2nd place.

Wolfie gobbled up enough prey to land her a 2nd place AG win!

I am so grateful to be surrounded by inspiring people who make me a better person and a better athlete.  

And just like family members all have nicknames for each other, I had to follow suit in the writing of this post.  Hence all the crazy nicknames.  We really are like family.  We really are ohana.

Lessons from Celery.

Have you ever cut celery?  You normally cut off the stalks an inch from the bottom, throw that stump in the trash, and continue chopping up the rest of the stalks.

There have been a lot of moments in my life that are like those celery stalk bottoms, in the form of  mistakes, failures, and things that I'm not too proud of.  And similar to when I'm in the kitchen, it's easier to whisk them off the cutting board, open up the trash can, haphazardly dump them in, shut the lid, and forget about them.

But recently, I've taken a good look at my life and realized that those 'mistakes' and 'failures' were huge bridges and building blocks in creating who I am today.

I don't like focusing on the past, but sometimes it's good to examine those 'stumps,' and let them sit for awhile.  Don't hate on them, love them.  Accept them as a necessary part of your journey.  Shine a little light on those issues instead of sweeping them under the rug.

And you will discover that with time, something amazing will emerge.  What you first thought was 'trash' always has the potential for growth, for new life.

Some things just need more water, love, and sunshine to grow again.

Life doesn't promise us an easy path.  But stay the course and stay courageous, no matter how hard the winds may blow.

So if you have a bunch of celery stems in your career path, your relationships, or even in your sport, accept them, give them some attention and know that nothing in life is a waste- everything has the potential for new life and new direction.

Wabi-Sabi.

My sister was the person who first introduced me to the term "wabi-sabi."  She apparently learned about it from my dad, who explained it as "finding the beauty and perfection in imperfection."  I was trying to wrap my head around this concept when she said, "Dad said that pinchpots are 'wabi-sabi' in an artistic expression." 

Ah, pinchpots.

The very first pinchpot that I made- working from one solid piece of clay and 'pinching' it outward to create a bowl. The whole time I had to remind myself that it was supposed to look asymmetrical.

Now I understood.  Wabi-Sabi is a Japanese world view or aesthetic expressing the beauty of things imperfect, impermanent and incomplete.  Each piece has a visual presence of its own and attempts to capture the simplicity and playfulness that are the cornerstone of the aesthetic.  Pinchpots embody the spirit of wabi-sabi because they are meant to be asymmetrical and imperfect, and this is what makes them beautiful.  Wabi-sabi is the reason why a vase with a crack down the center is deemed more unique and valuable than a perfectly shaped pot with no imperfections.  

There have been countless books and articles written about this concept of wabi-sabi in art, poetry, home decoration, and even lifestyle.  But what about in sport?

In triathlon, is it really perfection that we seek?  If I always had "perfect" training days and "perfect" races, the sport in itself would not be as attractive to me.  Even physically, our bodies are imperfect- perhaps we have flat feet, high arches, bum knees, disproportionate hip lengths, back problems or heart issues- but it is by embracing those imperfections and consciously moving forward when beauty is created.

This marked the 10th week of training with GL Coaching.  You'd better believe that I'm no perfect athlete.  But I freaking love the process, the growth- the opportunity that I have to go to That Place in each workout.  That one...you all know...the one where you stand toe to toe- with yourself- and you get curious, you get down, you dig deep, and you get stronger.

Exploring "That Place" with inspiring teammates.

It's not perfection that we seek.  But in the messy times, the struggles- those are the imperfect moments when we become more actualized, and we can truly see ourselves and what we are made of.  We are all pinchpots and our clay medium is triathlon.

Triathlon is comprised of 3 sports, so naturally an athlete will excel predominately in one of the disciplines, and have room for improvement in another.  It has been beautiful to watch the transformation of various squad members as they improve on their weakest link.  No one is "perfect" in all three sports.  It's been inspiring to watch the mental (and physical) improvement of everyone, as we all help each other along.  

It is by navigating through our imperfections when the most beautiful parts of who we are as individuals emerge- and that in itself is artistic expression in its truest form. 

We are not perfect.
And because of that fact, we are even more cherished and beautiful and valued by Someone, and by each other.
Wabi-sabi. Finding perfection in imperfection.
We are wabi-sabi in motion, as athletes.
This is the spirit of our sport.

Explore and embrace the beautiful athlete and individual that you are!

Who Do You Love?

At tonight's bike/run session, Coach mentioned his Aussie friend who had managed to mount his expensive bike above the headboard in the bedroom.  The visual made me laugh, and also reminded me of this great quiz written by Joe Kita that I had read in Bicycling magazine a few years back.  It was so perfect for me during that time in my life that I had actually torn it out and saved it.  I tried searching for the actual quiz online but couldn't locate it.

Fortunately, I had filed away the hard copy of the quiz, and it luckily survived various moves and relationships in between... 

For those of you in relationships, these are the hard questions to ask yourself... For each question, answer "bike" or "spouse."  If both apply, mark both.  If neither applies, move on to the next question.  If you're not married, substitute "girlfriend" or "boyfriend" for spouse.  At the end, calculate which entity receives more of your affection.  And I suppose if they both tie,  you can mount your bike above the headboard....

1. I'll never forget the first time I saw you.
2. I wanted you instantly.
3. I often find myself daydreaming about you.
4. There's more than one photo of us together on my desk.
5. I love showing you off to my friends.
6. My friends often remark how attractive you are.
7. In a typical week, we spend five or more hours of quality time together.
8. When you're around, I often look at you with admiration and longing.
9. In the last 3 months, I've spent more than $250 on you.
10. I desperately want to take you to Italy.
11. Our last ride lasted more than an hour.
12. It's thrilling how you respond beneath me.
13. I would never let anyone else ride you.
14. You make my heart beat faster.
15. You make me feel young.
16. You have taken me places and shown me things I never thought I would see.
17. When I'm alone with you, I'm at peace with the world.
18. You were made for me.
19. I can't live without you.
20. I will never upgrade to a newer model.

Pencils down.  Now break up or ride your bike accordingly.

#1830

Dear #1830:

It's been almost one week since I first met you, yet due to the nature of our sport, I feel like I already know so much about you. 

We exist in a sport that weighs so heavily on numbers (pace, heartrate, power, cadence, miles, speed)-  even 4 numbers attached to a racebelt represent your identity... yet behind those numbers I know there is a strength and a resilience that cannot be captured by objective data.

The outsiders call us crazy, but to each other, there is an invisible thread that weaves us together because of our shared experiences, albeit very personal, on and off of the race course.  We all have hit very dark, dark places that crack us open so we can feel the center of our own soul; yet have found strength in that vulnerability that eventually fuels us forward.
And always forward.  It is a sport that continually breaks us and rebuilds us, in a physical, spiritual, and emotional sense.

I read this beautiful article and thought of you, your dad, and how toeing the line on Saturday at Oceanside 70.3 is symbolic of so much more than swimbikerun.  

When it comes to living, it is always better to DNF than to DNS.

And so, on Saturday, my dear #1830, I ask that you forget about the numbers and think about your mantra- FEARLESS.  I know you said you were borrowing it from me, but it is now fully yours to embrace.  Because what we think about, we become.  So may your head be filled with good and positive thoughts.

Your Oceanside 70.3 wristband mantra...

The famous Aussie coach always reminds us to think, "I feel good, I feel strong, I feel relaxed," and even when I'm in the middle of a horrendous hill climb, it's amazing how I say those words and my body follows suit.  You can borrow these too; I'm sure he won't mind.

Leave the fear of the unknown behind.  Race with your heart.  It will not disappoint you.

Love,
#2111

A 'lil #throwback Thursday action- Oceanside 70.3 2010

P.S. And whatever you do, don't forget the important stuff-  Smile for the camera and pee in your wetsuit before the gun goes off.  (I just saved you from being asked if people can borrow your wetsuit.  You're welcome.)

Face Down, A$$ Up...

(Disclaimer: For those of you who are only here for the swimbikerun, skip this post.)

I could have 'yelped' them a 1-star.  Or I could blog.  So I'm blogging. 

This marked the end of my first week of 'real' running using a new technique (which left me sore in new places), as well as a beautiful and hilly bike ride today.  I knew I had a 90 minute massage tonight, so I didn't mind the extra soreness since I knew all those knots and tightness would be worked and massaged out.

So I did something that I never do- I didn't bother using the foam roller after today's ride. (ooooohhhh...) I figured that's my massage therapist's job, right?

The scene of our first (and last) date

I had the worst massage experience in my life.  So to keep my mind occupied during that horrendous time, I likened it to dating the wrong person.  Here goes...

HOW A BAD MASSAGE THERAPIST IS LIKE A BAD SIGNIFICANT OTHER

1. You don't trust them.  You have a feeling you'll leave injured.
I'm extremely sensitive to people's energy and can feel love through touch, or in this case, sloppiness.  It was the opposite of a nurturing deep tissue massage and I felt as though she didn't understand muscle anatomy, or how to follow the lines of the muscles along the body.  Her ADHD hands were all over the place without structure.  And I like structure.  It was like having a friend give you a free massage, where it feels somewhat good, but you can tell they don't have a clue what they're doing.  Well, she wasn't my friend.  And I was paying her.

2. You have to cut it short.
When you're with the right person, you want to spend more time with them.  When you're with the wrong person, all you can think about is an escape plan.  I had 90 minutes scheduled.  10 minutes in, I was brainstorming how I'd ask her to switch it to 60 minutes.

3. They try to gloss over the knots really, really hard instead of taking the time and patience to work them out individually.
Self-explanatory.

4.  Miscommunication.
This is inevitable, but it's worse with a language barrier.  Yes, I know I signed up online for 90 minutes.  No, I'm just in too much pain. (Better to pussy out than tell her she's horrible).  Yes, I want to change it only 60 minutes.  No, I didn't schedule it online for 60 minutes.  (This led to her having to leave the room to check the computer, which took 5 minutes. Which could have been 5 additional minutes banging on my tender neck).

5. They don't answer your questions directly.
"This is really tight!" (Bang, bang, bang)
"I know...it's from all the riding that I've been doing lately.  Is that considered my hamstring? Or is it my IT band?"
(brief pause)....
"Muscle! It da muscle." (Bang, bang, bang)

6.  The whole time you're with them, you're thinking about how much happier you'd be with someone else.
In the past, I had seen a great massage therapist who works on athletes and has an incredible grasp of muscle anatomy, trigger points, as well as an amazing touch.  The entire time I was being massaged, I was thinking about Michelle and how she was doing, how she was the best, and if she was free in the future weeks to schedule me in.

7.  You're relieved when it's over.
Normally, when massages end, you wish they would continue on forever.  But like bad relationships, when they're over, you can only feel a huge sense of relief and freedom.
After 60 minutes she said, "We're done!"
And the first two words that came to mind were, "Thank God!"

This was just my experience.  Wolfie came with me tonight and she had a good massage.  So maybe it's just me.  Then again, I gave Wolfie some protein powder samples that I tolerate well, and they didn't quite agree with her belly this morning.  So we're even now. :) And perhaps the take-home lesson is that with everything, whether it is protein powder or massage places- it depends on the individual.

Now...where's my foam roller?

Let It Shine.

"And as we let our light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.  As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others." 
                                                                      -Nelson Mandela

Small Wins.

It was around mile 70 when I could start to feel the tears welling up in my eyes.  My legs felt like lead.  I was dropped and watched the rest of the group ride away.  Last week at this same hill, I felt so good.  This week I could barely pedal my bike.

Keith dropped back and as I slowly rolled up to him he asked, "How are you feeling?"
It was hard to breathe because I was crying.  "I'm having a hard time.  Today is a bad bike day."

Yes, this did happen.

With the physically and mentally challenging day I had experienced, I was perfectly fine riding back at my own pace since we were only 10 miles away.  His answer surprised me.  "You didn't work your a$$ off for 70 miles to ride home alone.  We're all gonna ride back together."

The last 10 miles were a tangible reminder that in life we are never alone- there are people who act as our steady wheels, shielding and blocking the wind from us so we can arrive at our destination in one piece.

Was able to do this with the wisdom of my teammates and coaches.

In his book The Power of Habits, Charles Duhigg presents the concept of "small wins."  A huge body of research has shown that small wins have enormous power.  Once a small win has been accomplished, it fuels transformative changes that favor another small win. This chain reaction and momentum that is created can convince people that bigger achievements are obtainable.  Even in difficult or challenging times, this momentum still continues to propel you forward.  Pyschologists refer to this as the "science of small wins." The concept applies specifically to business and work models, but I found it can equally apply to sport. 

Thinking back on past training workouts, I rarely remember the easy, good days.  It's those hard days; the ones that really made a dent physically and mentally- that I can recall vividly. 

I can remember the first time I climbed through Morgan Territory, feeling the lactic acid in my legs, and with each turn, seeing the pitch in the road curve ever so slightly upward.  Countless times I contemplated getting off my bike to "stretch" (aka. catch my breath).  But I didn't.  I kept chugging onward.  I kept moving forward.  And I remember how that ride taught me that my little legs have more stamina than I give them credit for.

Or that steep little climb right at the top of Mt. Diablo.  You know, the one where you want to zigzag your bike to offset the grade percentage, or walk your bike up, or kill whoever constructed the road at such an angle?  Yes, these are the rides I remember.  These are my "small wins."

Today's ride distance and the yummy Wolf food that helped fuel me.

Physically, there was nothing "winning" about this ride today.  But it taught me that it is important to finish what you set out to do, and there are people who look after you and help you reach your goal.  During Ironman on the lonely parts of the course when it starts to feel hard, these are the moments that you recall.  This recollection of "small wins"- the times when you resisted the temptation to quit, moved past it and finished intact- provides the momentum that fuels you to that finish line.

Today at mile 70 I said that it was a bad bike day.
I was wrong.
Today was a small win.

B.L.I.N.D. Dates

(The following is an article I wrote for North Fitness last year.  With training volume increasing, the B.L.I.N.D. dates have made a reappearance to supplement the usual gels/GUs/Shotblocks that are starting to bore the palate)... Enjoy!

B.L.I.N.D. Dates
(Blended Lime juice In Nutty Deliciousness)

“There’s nothing worse than almost marrying someone, breaking if off, and having to start over with a blind date.  It’s like failing your senior year of high school and having to go back to kindergarten.”

 -Cindy Chupack

Ahh, the month of February.  Heart-shaped chocolates and truffles.  Romantic dinners with wine and red roses.

However, for those individuals whose significant ‘others’ take the shape of a bike, a running trail or a pool, perhaps now is a good time to start thinking about ‘dating.’

At the peak of Ironman training when I was juggling double-workout days and working full-time, it was hard to properly fuel my workouts given my time constraints.  As a result, I would go into a training session either starving and burn out too soon, or I’d eat a substantial snack that would in turn, need substantial time to digest.  By that time, the sun had set, and so had my motivation.

Enter, the blind date.   A colleague of mine noticed my dilemma and kindly shared her creation- a mixture of natural energy consisting of dates, lime juice and nuts.  Oh, the joys of simple nutrition!  I appropriately nicknamed them B.L.I.N.D dates (Blended Lime juice In Nutty Deliciousness). 

Just as real-life blind dates can sometimes be a pleasant surprise, these little creations were surprisingly delicious, and served their purpose well.  Not only were they easily digestible, but the energy from the dates was quick-burning, and the monounsaturated fats and protein from the nuts kept my stomach satisfied.  They conveniently fit into a gym bag or into the back of a jersey pocket for energy on the go.  Try it for yourself!

B.L.I.N.D. Dates

-2 c. nuts (almonds, cashews, pecans, walnuts, pistachios)

-2 c. pitted dates

-1/2 c. dried sour cherries

-2 Tbs. flaxseed

-juice from 1-2 limes

Directions: Using a food processor, combine the above ingredients.  Add enough lime juice to bind the ingredients enough where they can be easily rolled into balls. Enjoy!

Feel free to get creative with this basic recipe…try adding a scoop of protein powder, other dried fruit, shredded coconut, or even morsels of carob or chocolate for a sweeter variety.

Love is complicated enough.  Keep your nutrition simple.  Happy “dating!”

Original recipe and inspiration from the kitchen of my dear friend and fellow dietitian, Praveena Kumar, MS, RD.

The Icarus Deception

"Stop swimming from behind.  Swim YOUR fast."  Coach first said this to me from the pool deck on Tuesday morning.  He repeated these words to me this morning before practice.  I first thought he was referring to my swimming tendencies with my lanemate, since I tend to mindlessly gauge my efforts on his pace.  He is a strong, steady fish, and sometimes it's easier to swim in his shadow than listen to my own body and what is my own perceived effort.

But Coach was referring to the fact that I am swimming slower than I am capable of, mostly because I like to be comfortable.  How can I get faster if I refuse to swim and challenge my body to a higher threshold of work? (notice I deliberately didn't use the word pain...)

Remember Icarus, from Greek mythology? He attempted to escape from Crete by wings made of feathers and wax.  He ignored the instructions not to fly too close to the sun, and the melting wax caused him to fall into the sea where he drowned.

I recently heard of Seth Godin's book, The Icarus Deception: How High Will You Fly?, where he challenges the old rules of playing it safe and staying in your comfort zone in your career and life.  He flips the lesson on the classic Icarus myth, and instead praises Icarus for his willingness to take a risk and challenge preconceived notions.  In society, the real innovators and artists are those who defy traditional rules and strive higher.  They are not afraid to risk. Godin writes about how it is better to be sorry than safe.  We need to fly higher than ever.

In sport, our 'dangerous sun' is also know as our "red line"- the point that you reach where you either quit, vomit, or have to slow down.  Ironically, that line is rarely reached since our head prevents our bodies from ever coming close to that breaking point.

Most of us train in the gray zone, that comfortable place where we give some effort but not enough to make us faster in the long run.  I've been guilty of this.  I know my body and when things start to feel uncomfortable, I dial it back a little, recover and conserve.  I'd rather have "something left in the tank" than crash and burn.  I live up to my nickname at times, where I have a tendency to rest in the shadows and put out effort when I feel like I have something in the tank.  The problem is, I always have more than enough left in the tank.  I have yet to fly close to my sun because I have been afraid of the melting wax on my wings.

Exploring those limits with 3 minute TT relay efforts on the bike.
Gotta love the nickname! 

Hence, my coach's words of advice.

So today I swam MY fast, in my triathlon kit with more drag than I'd prefer.  I felt the lactic acid build up in my muscles.  I kept swimming.  I dismissed the negative thoughts telling me to slow down.  I concentrated on feeling strong and relaxed, and gliding effortlessly over the water.  I adopted the attitude of staying curious, not afraid.  Exploring my limits, and moving past them.

"Stop swimming from behind.  Swim YOUR fast."  Don't gauge your rhythm, your pace, and your path in life upon someone else's.  Pave and discover your own way.

I am still finding my fast in the pool and on the bike, and in life.  Today I came one step closer.

Stay curious.
Dance upon the edge.
Be like Icarus.

Broken.

I'd like to consider myself a pretty strong person.  But today was one of those days that rocked me to my core.  Tears fell at work.  A lot of tears.  

When your intentions are good and your actions are all done for a greater purpose of helping the situation, and it later all comes back to bite you in the bum, sometimes it causes you to question the entire system and the effectiveness of your role.

There is a garage parking attendant who has always been very sweet.  We don't know each other's names, but have developed a friendship over the past year.  He knows not to touch my badge because I'm bacteria-conscious and will drive close enough to swipe it myself.  Some days, I give him fun treats and snacks as I leave the parking garage.  Today all I had for him were the tears streaming down my face- what's the point of censoring your feelings when you have the road ahead and a box of kleenex in the car?  He touched my arm through the booth, and with sympathetic eyes he said, "Bad day?  It'll be ok tomorrow."

A phone call from a friend on the drive home helped.  It was a reminder that there are people who know my heart, my intentions, and that my work is valued.  These are the moments in life where special people, like those specks of sunshine, create a rainbow in your rainy day- reminding you to stay hopeful and keep your chin up.

Rainbows after the rain...

And like the parking attendant said, "It'll be ok tomorrow."  And I trust him.