What Did You Fail at Today?

For most children, dinner table conversations include questions like, "How was your day? What went well today for you?" But for Sarah Blakely, the founder of Spanx, she was asked a much different question each night by her father at the kitchen table- "What did you fail at today?"

She recalls, "If there was nothing, he'd be disappointed. I think failure is nothing more than life's way of nudging you that you are off course. My attitude to failure is not attached to outcome, but in not trying. It is liberating. Most people attach failure to something not working out or how people perceive you. This way, it is about answering to yourself. Failure was something we sought out and not this scary thing."

I've recently adopted this notion of the 'Blakely kitchen table' in my own life and started asking myself that question each night, "What did I fail at today?'  You may think that this question could lead someone down the hole into depression and straight to Loserville, but I am finding that the exact opposite happens.  In a sense, it is actually making me more fearless, urging me to constantly stretch myself in all areas of life.  So often it is easy to remain comfortable and to continue doing the things we are good at, right? But contemplating what I 'failed' at means that I need to try more things.  

Doing pool work post-work.

In the pool, I can comfortably swim 10 x 100 yards on the 1:30 interval.  I've been able to hold this interval (uncomfortably at times), but for the most part, since college.  Tonight, I decided to try and speed it up a bit, aiming for 10 x100 yds on the 1:25 interval. I made it to the 6th 100 until my lungs felt like they were going to explode and I hit the wall right when I was supposed to leave for the next interval. Did I feel like a failure?  Not at all!  Today, it wasn't about 'failing' to swim 10 x 100 yds on the 1:25, but learning that I had the speed and strength to swim 5 of them at that pace; something that I would have never even attempted in the past.  Sarah Blakely's father was brilliant.

I am allowing this question to permeate my life not only in sport, but also in the kitchen, in my relationships, and in my career. And so far, I've found that it has only been positive, spurring me on to stretch and try new things, without judgement or criticism.  Allow yourself to have the imaginative freedom to envision what you want to create in your life, without the inhibiting fear that most people have of the fear of failure.

Trying new things in the kitchen...I took a chance and didn't measure anything.
Thankfully, these sweet potato energy balls turned out well!

I prefer a different set of wheels, but hey, I tried!

Sometimes, it all boils down to reframing and rethinking the notion of failure. If you want to change your life, change the question- "What did you fail at today?"

Just what I was looking for. #change #SantaCruz

Get ready to be liberated. Get ready to be amazed.

Recipe Modifications.

I'd love to say that I'm a whiz in the kitchen, fluttering around in my apron, mixing a "pinch of this" and a "hint of that," eyeballing ingredients and seamlessly making substitutions in recipes as I use what's in my kitchen cupboards.

Truthfully, I am anything but that.  I am a slave to the measuring cups and spoons, pouring the exact amount of vanilla extract and measuring that 1/2 tsp. cinnamon.  And substituting?  Forget about it.  If I don't have all of the ingredients, that recipe can wait until I go to the store.

I am even a tad jealous of how most Asian people can wash rice and use their index finger to gauge how much water to add.  What if your index finger is really short and you don't add enough?  Then it'll be too dry.  Too much?  Then it'll be too soggy.  I'd gladly measure out the water, thankyouverymuch.

So, what's behind all of this?  My type-A nature could be to blame.  I could say that I'm a perfectionist and I like following directions.  But really, the truth is that I'm afraid to fail.

Aren't we all?

I had the pleasure of hearing the amazing Kris Carr speak live this weekend in San Jose, where she talked about her own journey in the kitchen that began with her learning how to boil water.  She told a funny story where she was asking herself, "But what if I mess up the kale salad?  Then everyone will judge me!"  She spoke about how we are all afraid to mess up in the kitchen, but as we continue to experiment with creativity, we build skill sets and confidence.  As a result, the initial overwhelming fear of failing diminishes.  

Lemon coconut flour cookies with chia seeds ('cause, hey...why not?)

A few weeks ago I had some extra lemons and decided to throw all caution to the wind and modify a recipe.  I love lemons- lemon bars, lemon muffins, lemon meringue, so clearly, lemon coconut flour cookies should also be in that fabulous mix, right? I definitely thought so. Miraculously, it turned out well (read: turned out on the cooling racks and not in the trashcan)  and I had happy taste-testers!  My experiment with a basic coconut flour cookie recipe started a new trend in my life- use what you love to be your inspiration, stick to a good basic recipe model that works, and don't allow the fear of failure to stunt your creativity.

And so I have applied this lesson also to my career.  Although I enjoy clinical nutrition in the hospital setting, in a sense, I am now modifying the basic 'recipe' and expanding it to the community sector.  I am so excited to join the staff at Crufit to help individuals become healthier with better nutrition.  If you know me, you know how passionate I am about sports, nutrition, and assisting people on their health journey.  I am thrilled for this opportunity to stretch those muscles more, to take a basic recipe model of sound nutrition, and creatively adapt it to help active adults get healthier.  Crufit is a brand new studio in Montclair with top-notch instructors who specialize in rowing, cycling and TRX.

Crufit's brand new cycling theater- complete with wireless power meters that connect to the main screen!

In the theme of modifications, all you cyclists are familiar with the term RPM- revolutions per minute.  I just attended a 2-day conference this weekend and heard some of the most inspiring and thought-provoking speakers like Dr. Wayne Dyer, Caroline Myss, Kris Carr, Gregg Braden, and Davidji.  

No, that's not Moses.  It's Davidji. 

My favorite speaker was Davidji, who spoke about transitioning from being a crisis meditator to establishing a daily meditation practice.  Meditation is about accessing the space between- the space between our action, our thoughts and our words.  When we can access that space, we connect to our deepest, most authentic self.  How do we do that?  By ritualizing our practice.  By making it a habit, just like brushing our teeth.  So this my friends, is now our new acronym for RPM-

Rise.
Pee.
Meditate.

Like Lance once said, it's not all about the bike.  Go deeper.  Modify your recipes in life.  Get creative.  

Remember the Wonder

Enjoying the gorgeous view of Skyline after climbing Pinehurst

    
    Last Sunday afternoon, I was cresting the top of Redwood Road on my bike when I spotted 2 bikes laying on the side of the road.  I could see one figure sitting down and one hovering over him.
    Immediately, my heart began to race.  My legs were thoroughly trashed from the mileage I had already ridden that day, and I had only 2 Clif Shotblocks left and was running low on water.  I calculated how long it would take me to descend into an area with decent cellphone reception to call 911.
    From a distance, I heard a voice-
    "Um, excuse me, Miss?"
    "Yes! How can I help?  Are you guys ok?  What do you need?" I shouted as I climbed towards them.  I quickly crossed over to the other side of the road, only to be met with young faces, dressed in cotton t-shirts and shorts, perfectly unharmed.
    "Oh yeah.  We're fine.  I was wondering if you could please take a picture of me and my friend." 
    Phew! Everyone was ok.
    "How old are you guys?" I inquired once my heartrate returned to normal.
    "We're 14 years old.  We rode all the way from Orinda.  So far, we've ridden 25 miles!"  The boy couldn't have shown me a prouder grin.  "We're heading to a bike shop in Castro Valley.  It's our longest ride yet!  Oh, and can you make sure you get the lake in the background when you take the picture?  Thanks."


    After I had snapped their picture, we chatted for a bit.  I applauded them on their mileage and they shared how they were interested in road biking and cyclocross. 
    "How much does your bike weigh?  What size tires are those?" they asked inquisitively.  I laughed to myself, as I could only imagine them later on in life, like the stereotypical cyclists who starred in those YouTube videos of "Sh*t Cyclists Say."


    It was endearing, to say the least, to see these two young boys adventurously making their way to new places via bicycles, and capturing it all on camera.  I recognized in them the initial excitement and wonder I once had felt the first time I experienced the world from a bicycle.  


    How many times had I ridden past that same exact place and instead been focused on my leg turnover and cadence, making sure that I was in the correct heartrate zone, or trying my best not to get dropped by the other riders?  I wanted to take a picture of these two adorable boys, but felt that could be considered somewhat stalker-ish, so instead I savored the important lessons these young 14 year-olds taught me in our brief conversation....

• Once in awhile, take a break and enjoy the beauty of your surroundings.
• Stay inspired.
• Recognize how far you've come already while still courageously moving forward to the places you want to go.
• Enjoying the sunshine on your bike sure beats playing Xbox inside.
• Even if you've been riding your bike for years and have logged thousands of miles, always remember the wonder.